Apr 14, 2009

*NEW -FUPPETS- FEATURE!* - Lady D's Medical Mystery Files # 1

-FUPPETS- is proud to announce our first ever correspondent, Lady D. She will be gracing -FUPPETS- with the ever increasing array of medical curiosity and insanity, in order to better blow our minds. Today's first installment of Lady D's Medical Mystery Files will once again help prove the axiom that ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE.

LADY D's Medical Mystery Files #1

A five-centimeter fir tree has been found in the lung of a man who complained he had a strong pain in his chest and was coughing blood.
The 28-year-old patient, Artyom Sidorkin, came to a hospital in the city of Izhevsk in Central Russia last week, Komsomolskaya Pravda daily reports.
Doctors x-rayed his chest and found a tumor in one of the lungs. Suspecting cancer, they made a decision to perform biopsy, but when they cut the tissue, they were amazed to see green needles in the cut.
“I blinked three times, and thought I was seeing things. Then I called the assistant to have a look,” says Vladimir Kamashev, doctor at the Udmurtian Cancer Center.
The five-centimeter branch was removed from the patient’s body.
“They told me my coughing blood was not caused by any disease,” Sidorkin says.
“It was the needles poking the capillaries. It really hurt a lot. But I never felt like I had an alien object inside of me.”
It is obvious that a five-centimeter branch is too large to be inhaled or swallowed, doctors say. They suggest that the patient might have inhaled a small bud, which then started to grow inside his body.
Meanwhile, the piece of lung with the little fir tree has been preserved for further study. - ( MOSNEWS.COM )

That is some wild shit. Life is pervasive. While it is -FUPPETS- contention that, as far as we know, our planet Earth may be the only place in the galaxy that harbors the strange process we label "Life," it is also well known that Life will stop at nothing to propagate itself, spreading to every conceivable and even inconceivable niche in our world, even if it happens to be inside the lung tissue of a living organism, in this case a human being. This is almost like a tree parasite! If "nature" had run it's course on this you can be sure that the man would eventually have dropped dead somewhere, and if left alone, that fir tree would have risen triumphantly out of the rotted, bloated corpse, ready to live it's full life, using the nutrients from that man's body to nourish itself as it grew into a majestic Fir. Morally, that tree, as a living organism, would have just as much right to live and propagate as any other creature, humans included.

What a wonder nature is. -FUPPETS- hopes you look forward to more of Lady D's Medical Mystery Files.

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