Jan 16, 2009

Top-Shelf Turntables

In an IDEAL world, the -FUPPETS- sound-system would be of such creaminess that women would swoon and men would strangle themselves in deep, deep jealousy.
Some love to look at high-end cars, some love to admire high-end clothing and fashions, and some actually will talk for hours about how awesome their ridiculously expensive bathroom fixtures are. Fuck these people. What -FUPPETS- cares about is ridiculous stereo equipment, and amazing sound - the kind of sound that makes you weep and your momma cry.
Here are some Audiophile Porn Images for your enjoyment.

Every system needs a top-shelf Receiver, and this one looks like a cream-dream, and weighs a full 70 pounds!

Check out the back of this elegant mo-fo. It boggles the mind to imagine the amount of work it would take to set this shit up properly.

While -FUPPETS- supports Vinyl in all it's formats, and derides the ridiculous drink-coaster CD's, a proper CD player has to be included. One cannot waste one's old compact discs because one hates the mo-fucks. This CD player below is top of the line and can do any digital media. This bad boy can store over twenty thousand compact discs worth of data! Damn!

Now for the Vinyl. Oh how -FUPPETS- fetishizes the Vinyl LP. To have a top-shelf turntable, it must be heavy (reduce vibration) and adaptable (different cartridge heads for different music) and it does not hurt if it looks like some sort of futuristic weapon. Here are several Audiophile quality turntables, any of which would be enough to drive a record collector into a deliriously spastic freak-out frenzy.

Here is the ROKSAN RADIUS 5. Just beautiful.

And now, the top-shelf DaVINCI AUDIO LABS AAS GABRIEL TURNTABLE. 24K gold and costing around forty-five thousand dollars, this is too nice to touch.

and the single most expensive turntable around, The CLEARAUDIO STATEMENT.

A $125,000 assembly of wood, aluminum, and other sundry bits that has only one endeavor, to play records, and play them outstandingly well. Weighing 770 pounds, the Statement derives its rotational motivation from the same type of electric motor used to propel the Mars Rover. It touts a patented magnetic driven sub platter, dynamic balanced platters, Kardan turntable chassis suspension, real time speed control and active blue LCD display. ( BornRich.org )

-FUPPETS- is left speechless. The platter on these high end turntables does not rest on anything. It "floats" on a magnetic levitation system! No lie!

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